


Eat A Dick, Solo

by MizuPhoenix



Series: CrackFic One-Shots [4]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Daddy Kink, F/M, Hangry, Mention of pregnancy, Or Rey's "pie", Spanking, You're not yourself when your hungry, crackfic, eat a snickers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 12:01:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20796305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MizuPhoenix/pseuds/MizuPhoenix
Summary: Have you ever felt Hangry? Well, Ben definitely is. When he comes home after the worst day to find a huge mess, and his fiancee is unrepentant, another hunger comes to the surface.





	Eat A Dick, Solo

**Author's Note:**

  * For [QueenBumble](https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenBumble/gifts).

> Inspired LONG AGO by A dear friend, and I think it's High time I finally released it. Hope it lives up to expectations.

“Can you not make a complete and utter mess of our house? For one day?”

Ben Solo was having a day. In spite of the bright blue sky and the puffy white clouds – which was only serving to mock him further – this was the _worst _day of his life. Now he was finally home after the day from hell, only to find the living room littered with packing peanuts.

While a ravenous hunger clawed at his stomach, he was not so far gone yet to attempt to eat them. Despite their delicious sounding name.

Add to that his girlfriend had burnt ‘dinner'. If one could call the black mass smoking in one of his pans something that was once food. Rey could not cook to save her life. She tried – bless her heart – but she could not boil water without risking a fire in their home. Normally he would find this adorable, and he would sweep the woman he loved into his arms, and save them by making risotto, or some beef wellington.

Not today.

Today he was starving, and he did not want to waste the little energy he had left on cooking a meal for him and his disaster-prone fiancee. So he had done the only logical thing he could have. He bitched and moaned, loudly.

Rey, it seems was taking exception to his bitching, "can you not throw a bitch fit like a five-year-old? I was _trying _to make you something nice. I got distracted.”

Ben threw his briefcase onto the counter, knocking the gift bag that had been there and sneered at the mess in the living room. “By what? Your little art project?” he pointed towards the offending mess he was going to have to sift through to reach the couch.”

"I got a little over-excited because your surprise shipped a whole day early," Rey huffed, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Oh,” Ben grumbled grabbing the oven mitts – which were laid out on the still turned on stove – eye twitching. “You shouldn’t have,” sarcasm dripped from every word not unlike the black goop that was both burnt to cinders yet was still soggy. “Really Rey, you shouldn’t have.”

Rey scowled at him, his red apron stained with all manner of things. How one could be so messy in the kitchen he had no idea. His eyes roamed over the oven and then to the sink and he wanted to scream. Why did she need three skillets and two other pans? And how were they just as bad as the one he was still holding?

“Why are you being such a dick?” she demanded tapping her foot as if _he _were the one in the wrong.

“I don’t know? Why did you decide tossing packing peanuts around the house like confetti was a brilliant idea?”

“I did-”

"Or burning everything in the fridge in an attempt to burn the house down, with you still in it, was also a genius plan?" he continued, opening the fridge to discover that even the steaks he had marinating for dinner tomorrow were gone.

“I didn’t use everyth-”

“So now we’re splitting hairs? Really Rey? You want to be that much of a bitch?”

Rey reeled back as if slapped. A tiny voice begged he get on his knees and beg forgiveness. Sadly the growling of the demonic presence in his stomach drowned the voice of reason out.

“You can just go fuck yourself!” Rey screamed, tears welling up in her hazel eyes.

Rey’s tears had always triggered a protective response within him. He could never resist giving her everything when the flecks of gold in her eyes were enhanced by the reflective droplets of anguish.

Today, he was not quite feeling himself. Her tears triggered another hunger within him. “I’m not fucking around Rey! If this is how you are going to act then I think _Daddy_ needs to remind you to behave, _Little One.”_

The gasp that left the petal pink lips of his fiancee was _delicious. _Ben wanted nothing more than to devour it whole and savor every second of it.

“Don’t you pull that after you-”

Ben was having none of his little girl’s bratty nature today. This was the perfect way to de-stress after his day from hell. “Little One,” he warned, his voice dropping an octave. Watching the woman who drove him crazy – whom he loved more than anything in this world – shiver, sent a smirk to his lips.

“I think I’m going to have to just eat you,” he vowed stalking towards her.

“But the mess,” Rey stuttered holding her hands up.

“We’ll clean later,” he decided, hands coming to rest on her hips. “Now I want you in the bedroom in nothing but this apron,” he ordered as he fingered the red fabric, giving it a hard yank.

“But, Daddy, it’s dirty,” she pouted.

He bent down and placed his lips against the shell of her ear. “Then maybe you’ll learn your lesson and not make a huge mess of anything but those pretty panties, and your sloppy little cunt, Little One.”

Rey squeaked, then turned tail and rushed towards their bedroom. Ben glared at the chaos around him and made a mental list for when they would be cleaning later. Sex would be a nice pallet cleanser from his day at the office, but he was still warring with the raging anger and the desire to fuck his frustrations out on his very naughty – and very willing – fiancee.

Stalking into the bedroom, Ben eyed Rey like the adorable little snack she was. She had listened and was only wearing his red apron – that was still stained with lord only knew what – and was perched at the edge of the bed. Kneeling with her bare ass presented, her cunt dripping and swollen.

“How many spankings, Little One?” he murmured as he toed off his shoes and loosened his tie.

“Three?” Rey tried in that oh so cute voice that normally had his heart swelling in his chest.

“I don’t think so,” he growled, the mess he would have to clean up still burnt behind his eyelids. “Try again.”

“Five,” she offered weakly turning her head to plead with her big beautiful eyes.

“Ten,” he declared, crossing the room to run his hands along the curve of her pert ass. He watched her little mouth open, the frown in her eyes a clear sign she was about to protest. “If you don’t want to make it fifteen you close that pretty little mouth. You can eat later, love. I still haven’t had my meal.”

That seemed to do the trick, the shiver he could feel accompanied by the wanton moan set his cock into a twitching mess. “Yes, Daddy.”

Without warning, his hand met the plush flesh of Rey’s peachy ass. He had to resist leaning down to take a nibble as it bounced and reddened.

“One,” Rey counted automatically.

“You know why you’re being punished?” he asked, as his hand connected again.

“Two,” Rey turned to catch his eye, “you’ve had a bad day and you’re grumpy,” was her waspish reply.

_Still that sass. _Ben made sure his neck smack would sting, onto the yet untouched cheek. “Back talking? You want more spankings, Little One?”

“Three,” Rey whimpered, her ass swaying in the air as she dropped her face into the mattress. “No,” she whined. “But-”

“No butts,” Ben chided as he swung again. “Except yours, red and raw from your punishment.”

“Four,” Ben’s cock swelled further as Rey broke down and moaned outright. “Daddy please...”

He swung again, “Please what princess?”

“Five,” her entire body was shaking. “I need, I need you to touch me.”

There was never a more beautiful sight than the woman he loved – who also drove him insane at times – gushing slick and begging for him. "But I am touching you," he ran both hands over the globes of her red rump. Lightly scraping his nails over the sensitive flesh, to induce her to arch her back and press her ass into his raging hard-on.

“I need more,” she begged.

“I’ll give you more Little One. Just a few more.” Another hit.

“Six, please Daddy, I’ll be good!”

He swung again, taking hold of her hips to keep her wiggling against his cock. “You can keep wiggling, but you stay put. Did you learn your lesson?” He swung again.

"Seven! I did! I won't make a huge mess without cleaning it up!" Rey cried, pressing herself harder against him. Her needy little moans were constant now.

“Good. Good girl. And we won’t make messes in the Kitchen, and let Daddy do all the cooking, right?”

He swung again, this one light as he was becoming too focused on the sensation of his needy little fiancee grinding herself on his cock. She was staining his paints with her slick, he could feel it soaking into his boxers.

“Eight. Yes, yes I promise.”

God, he wanted to just unzip his pants and pound into her. "Two more, then Daddy's going to eat that delicious treat you're making for him," he vowed.

"Nine," Rey's entire body was convulsing. "Daddy I'm going to come!"

“Come for me, Little One,” he ordered as his hand made contact.

He did not even bother waiting for Rey to count the last one before he was on his knees devouring her cunt. Eager swipes of his tongue lapped up every gush as she came apart around his mouth. He moaned into her tight cunt, juices spilling down his throat as he drank every drop he could get his greedy mouth on.

He was _famished._

Ben knew nothing but the sweet taste of Rey’s cunt for the next several minutes. The world could be ending and he would not stop partaking this meal for anything. He needed to be filled with her essence – needed her sweet nectar to sate all forms of his hunger. It was not until a word drifted to his ears that he stopped.

“Red!” Rey was crying.

And like a bucket of cold water had been dumped onto him, he backed away and then immediately wrapped Rey into his arms. "Oh no. Baby, I'm so sorry. Are you alright?"

“Of course I’m not alright!” she wailed. “You were a complete ass when you came home. Then you decide I deserve punishment for trying to do something nice for you, and I get a little messy,”

_That was not a little mess, _Ben thought but chose – wisely – to keep that little nugget to himself.

“Then you kept eating me out even after I came. Three times, Ben! I was too sensitive, and you wouldn’t even respond to me!”

He was not sure giving his messy little fiancee three orgasms with his lips and tongue was a terrible thing, but not responding to her...Well, that was pretty bad. He was usually so attuned to her, it was like they were bound by some cosmic force.

“Did I hurt you?” he worried, squeezing her tighter into his arms.

“No, but you do have me worried. What the hell happened today?” Rey demanded, her eyes searching as she cupped his jaw.

Ben explained how he had dropped his bagel onto the street that morning after running late. Rey was well aware of the reason why her naked temptations in the shower being the cause. His anger at the bird that made off with his homemade bagel squawking with glee.

Then he had fudged the numbers for his meeting and Hux and Dameron both had called him out on it. Taunting him in front of his mother, and smirking the entire time. The insufferable pricks. They further worsened his day when he found both men had eaten the manicotti he had made for his lunch.

With his earlier faux pas that morning his mother was riding his ass all day, and he had no time to order lunch. So broke his rule and snuck to the vending machine to get _something _to fill the void in his stomach. Except for the crotchety old asshat that was restocking the damn machine would not even let him buy something.

He had offered the man a hundred for some stale shitty chips.

Of course, his mother just had to come around the corner and drag him off – by his ear no less – to finish going over the meeting notes for the next day. Then he came home to a packing peanut explosion in his living room, a burnt mass on his counter, and his beautiful fiancee nowhere to be found. He snapped, like a kit kat bar.

With his tale complete he saw Rey fiddling with her phone. The demonic voice that had been placated rose up once again. He yanked the phone from her hands and glared down at her.

“Are you seriously ignoring me to,” he looked down at the phone to see the domino’s app blinking that the order was being made.

Rey took her phone back and yanked on his ear. “You listen here, Solo. You are a monster – when you’re hungry. Add to that you are picky as all hell, and _no one _can deal with you when you’re like this. I ordered a pizza-”

“With pineapples?”

Rey rolled her eyes and shoved him away from her, off the bed. “Yes with pineapples!”

Hearts in his eyes as he stared at the beautiful goddess lounging – spitting with anger – on his bed. “I love you, and I don’t deserve you,” he praised.

“I don’t know how I put up with you when you’re like this?” she whispered, more to herself than to him. “If you act like this around our child I’m going to wring your...”

Ben’s brain shorted out for a moment. The hunger haze must have completely taken hold of him. “Wait, did you just say our _child?”_

Rey flushed, “surprise?”

Packing peanuts. Gift Bag. Something delivered early. Rey attempting to cook even though she knew she would burn ice cream if given the chance.

“I’m going to be a father?” Ben could barely contain his glee.

Rey shook her head, untying the messy apron from around her neck. “Not if you don’t get your hangry side under control, mister.”

Ben scooped Rey into his arms and spun her around. "That's amazing! Oh, why didn't you tell me earlier?"

“Because you were being a colossal asshole?”

“I’m sorry,” and he meant it.

“Yeah well, maybe you should see a doctor about it. When your blood sugar gets low you really do turn into another person entirely. Your Mother and I have nicknamed that side of you too. Kylo, after the grouchy poodle you had as a kid.”

“Don’t talk badly about Kylo, he was sweet.”

“Ben,” Rey’s tone was one of warning. Which he promptly ignored.

“What else did you order?”

“Stop trying to change the subject! And put me down!” she demanded.

Ben complied and felt his annoyance rise again. "You know how I feel about going to the doctors unless it's a medical emergency."

“Then I’m eating all the pizza,” Rey countered.

“Fine!” he agreed – under duress.

* * *

After Don, the delivery driver had left – a man who looked to have been beaten by life itself – Ben salivated over the pizza. He surveyed the now clean living room, and the crib placed deliberately on the middle of the rug.

“I still can’t believe you didn’t even see it,” Rey chuckled, laying on the sofa.

“Well, you did leave a rather large mess.”

“I helped clean it up,” Rey defended, reaching out for the box he held tight in his grip.

Ben sat down and opened the lid hiding the treasure within. "Just let me eat this. I still have to give you your own meal, Little One." Rey ripped the box from his lap as he was gingerly raising a greasy slice to his lips. "Hey!"

“Oh, eat a dick, Solo.”

“You will," he promised. That hunger – the one that was fully focused onto Rey and her alone – could never be sated for long. The demon in his stomach, however, sang praises to the brilliance of pineapple on pizza – true and perfect culinary cuisine. It could tame any demon.

**Author's Note:**

> Yet Another Crackfic to add to the collection. Hope you enjoyed.


End file.
